Family Ties

When I was growing up I did not know my extended family very well.  My mom had a lot of issues with her family and my biological father was not in the picture so it kept us from spending time with aunts and uncles and cousins.  I really don't know any of my extended family even now as an adult.  I mean I am friends with some of my aunts and cousins on facebook but that is about it. When I had kids I swore I would do whatever it took to make sure that my kids were close with their aunts and uncles and cousins and I am proud to say that they are.  Sure they could be closer with some, but I do my part to keep the relationships open, I cannot force people to be active parts of our life if they don't want to be.  My kids get to grow up with their cousins and that is so awesome to me.  I get to be an aunt, which I totally love and am really good at and we all get to feel part of a family, outside of our own little unit.  As a kid I always felt so lonely and like I was missing out on something because I did not have close relationships within my family.  Even today it saddens me that I am not closer with the many cousins and aunts and uncles that I have, as I value family so much and would love to be close with all of them.  

The kids just got some Easter presents from one of their aunts and I know how excited they are going to be when they come home and open their boxes!!  The kids and I also started this thing where each set of aunt and uncles gets a holiday and we send little packages with cards and special things to them on that holiday.  So far we have done Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, April fool's Day and Easter.  We picked the "off" holidays like Labor Day and Earth Day and silly ones like that, so that they have to put thought into what they send.  So far each box has been so much fun for us to put together and for the person receiving to get!!  It has allowed the kids the chance to get to know each aunt and uncle so they know what kind of things to pick out for their boxes!!  It has really been a fun little venture and I think this going to be an annual thing for us.  Each year we will mix up the holidays, and just keep showing how much we love the people in our lives!!

Family is what you make it right?  Well I am making a close family with memories and closeness, because that is what my heart tells me we need!

Dream a little Dream ~ My dream to be a Writer.

We all have dreams, don’t say you don’t. It is human nature to have dreams, hopes, aspirations, goals... whatever word you want to use to name them. We all have them.  Somewhere maybe in the depth of your soul, covered in a layer of dust, there is a dream just waiting for you to find, rediscover and maybe possibly even make come true.

I have many dreams that come in many shapes and sizes. I have tinny little dreams and life altering, world changing dreams. I think about my dreams often, daydream about them and pray to achieve them. I have a main dream that has stayed with me for as long as I can remember. I want to be a writer. I don’t dream about just writing, no I want to be known as an author. I want to contribute something to this world beyond my children and the legacy they will grow. I want to share my words, my thoughts, and my imaginationJ. I want to write books that bring something to the people who read them, whether it is a smile and a laugh or a tear and a sigh. I want to write words that touch on memories forgotten and moments lost through time. Okay, I realize I am oozing sappiness right now with my Hallmark inspired words, but it is all true. I love to write, to create with words. Writing, being a writer is all I’ve ever really wanted to do with my life. Of course my life took a path I did not expect and writing has had to wait. Thankfully I was able to find this dream again, now that the kids are older and I have had 5 minutes to focus on it, versus the 30 seconds I use to have to eat, shower and sleep when the kids were little.

Although I’ve always written stuff, it was always for my eyes only, or for school, or a letter to my Grandma. I am just now finding my footing with the whole writing for public viewing. I struggle with things like actually finishing a piece, or with proper grammar or proper writing structure. I did not go to college for writing (although I really wish I had). I have a lot to learn about being a good writer and I have a lot of growing to still do as a writer. The truth is though, I am tired of putting this dream, this true passion of mine on the back burner. So even though it is going to be sloppy and disorganized, I am going to write. I might have run-on sentences, the flow of the piece might be a disaster and the content may only consist of the random ramblings of an overworked, underpaid woman who is also a mom and wife, but I am going to write. I know in my heart of hearts that someday, maybe tomorrow or a month from now, or a year from now, maybe even possibly 10 years from now (God I hope not) it will all come together and I will be the writer I want to be, the writer I dream of being, the writer I know I am!!

Let's get this party started!

After years of keeping sooo much to myself, I've decided to stop being a coward and stop hiding all my (self-described) phenomenal wit, humor and rage from the world.  No more will my whimsical parenting stories, brilliant advice on life, love and shoes, top 10 lists and lunatic rants be just for my family, friends and diary!!

Admittedly I have no idea if anyone will find my family, or our misadventures entertaining but I give up giving a crap.  I love writing about all the fails of parenthood I experience, the random things my kids say… and eat… and wear, the outrageously entertaining and disturbing things I find on the internet, stupid things people say and or do and even occasionally something my hubby does (like asking if I can refer to him as The Captain from now on).

I've got 3 fabulously talented, precocious and devious children who challenge my sanity and morality every single day.  I love that they frustrate and charm me, because I am raising them to be tough-ass ingenious nerds who know how to cook, fold towels, two-step, balance a check book, dance in the rain and love with all their hearts.  My hubby (NO, I am not calling him The Captain) and I have been working on this marriage thing for 13 years already (wow… 13 years, really, already?) and we are the first to admit that our life is messy and at time very complicated, but worth every single moment!

Parenthood is a continues ride of ups and downs.  There are those days where I get my ass handed to me and then the days I think I could have 5 more kids (of course then the insanity passes).  I am not going to wind any mommy of the year awards (yet), I still have a long way to go to be the parent I really want to be and as a mom with a job outside of the house I walk a tightrope, juggling bowling balls every day and some days there are tears and screaming and more yelling than I care for and some days I drink too much (even vodka taste good with Starbucks!) and some days I would rather be in bed with my chickens (yes I call my kids chickens) watching hours of Netflix than doing anything else.

Ahh, my chickens… they are my 3 most favorite people in the whole world that are not old enough to drink with me yet.  J-Bird is my oldest.  She is 15 and reminds me way too much of myself at that age.  I adore her and envy her youth and spark (even if she doesn't this she has one).  She loves her friends, but will tell you she hates people.  Bubba is my darling boy.  At 11 (just a few weeks away from the last year of his childhood actually) he is my baby boy.  He started middle school this year, leading to a few new grey hairs on my head.  He has a passion for video games (even writes a blog about the games he likes), computers and an obsession with YouTube.  He likes it when I let him cook dinner and has incredible patients and the biggest hear of anyone I've ever known.  T-Dog is the baby.  At 8 years old she is a full blown Diva.  Don’t let the sweet smile and puppy dog eyes fool you, she can and will eat you alive.  She is most certainly all sugar and spice with a healthy dose of sass thrown-in for good measure.  My chickens are already ½ grown and I know I've missed plenty of opportunities to give them more than what I did, but it’s never too late in my optimistic mind.  I am determined to teach my kids about real life, the real world, with all its beauty, color, passion, sadness, disappointment, messiness, culture, humor, rage and fear.   I am determined to help them stay kids for as long as possible; hubby and I both had to grow up way to fast – and it sucked.  I am mom and I say they can take their time growing up.  My kids are not spoiled or babied or pampered.  Their childhoods have not been perfect by any stretch of the imagination up to this point and they will all probably need therapy someday, but at least they will be able to say they had childhoods.

This is going to be a fun adventure for me – for my family, sharing our slightly off balanced life with the world.  My two passions writing and motherhood collide!  Hold on tight Chickens – Here We Go!